In between dark and light

I woke in a cold sweat that morning. I normally don't have nightmares but this had shaken me so badly I could barely breathe.

It was in the council room, three coffins were laid out. One normal sized one and two smaller ones, child like. I remember walking towards them. They were closed. I lifted the two smaller lids first. Inside there were two children. Sweet little angels, lips tinged blue in death. I felt sick as I lowered the lids closed again. My heart twisted as I approached the third. I had my thoughts who was here and I prayed feverently that I was wrong.

I didn't know how I knew I just did. When I lifted the third lid, I dropped to my knees. Phobia was lying there, dressed in her favroite set of robes. She looked so peaceful that I thought for a moment that maybe I had done something wrong and she was playing a pratical joke on me as payback. Then I turned around to look. There was the entire council, Anakin, DJK, Adana.. My head felt like it was going to split. And there just beyond the coffins stood Arialia. " Do you want to know why your wife and children lay dead ?" she asked me.

I couldn't speak I just nodded. I didn't want to loose it here in front of everyone.
" Because you stood back and let her do too much. She worked herself to death. Chasing down that demon and her apprentice.
You have the power to stop Catia once and for all. You can prevent this from happening"

Then everything dissapeared in a snap and that's when I woke. As I reached for my glasses I noticed one thing. I'd been crying.

I looked over where Phobia usually was and for a moment panic flooded me. She was gone and the other side of the bed was cold.She'd been gone for a while. just as I was about to call her I saw her note and breathed a sigh of relief. She was in the archives. She'd be there all day if I didn't go get her. After a quick shower and a drink I headed out the door and met Madam Nu at the archivist's desk.

" She's been there since 3 am .. I tried to make her go get some sleep but she was so insistant on tracking that demon.." she shook her head and moved away Her favroite place, a small couch in the back of the archives where she would work in semi comfort. As I started towards her I could ee the paleness in her skin, the haunted look in her eyes. She didn't even lift her head " I can't rest, not now.. She's shown me the path.. I can save Marasha. You know I would show the same devotion if it were Belda or one of my own children"

I grabbed her by her wirst. I might have hurt her if I hadn't have relaxed my grip. " You won't HAVE any children if you keep this pace up! Phobia you're wearing yourself thin! You've got to slow down, you're scaring me.. " I didn't mention the dream I had. She didn't need more worry.

She didn't want to look at me. I could feel her self hatred of her caring eating her alive.. Christ I need to watch my temper espically when it comes ot her.. I didn't want to scare her but.. I honestly doubted she'd listen otherwise. I forced her to look at me. Her eyes were shining with unshed tears. She said before caring sometimes is a curse. I can see how." I will help you Phobia, just ask me, you know I 'd do anything for you. But I'm begging you, slow down before you kill yourself, before you kill our children"

Something in her eyes snapped.. I could see it. She broke down crying in my arms. I let her rest against me as I steered her over back to the couch." I don't hate you for wanting to help. I couldn't. That's one of the many things that made me fall in love with you in th e first place. But listen, I can take your burden as well if I need to. I'll just find someone to teach my classes for a few days. We can do this, together. Don't shut me out Pho.. please.. Force I want to be here for you.. for them" I let one hand rest on her stomach while staring up at the map she had constructed with the other. Another five months and it would all be over. I hated myself for making her cry, it breaks my heart everytime she does.

" I know this symbol, its of the Royal House of Corellia.. The old Sith Repbulic, you know what it looks like today.. "

I was studying the map with a critical eye.. It was a good thing I forced myself to pay attention in history class .Her emotions surged and the next thing I knew she had almost tackled me to the couch in a fierce hug. " Now this means if there's three points left in the symbol, then.. "

She traced the route in midair with a finger " There's three places they haven't hit. Alderann and Naboo are in the path of the lineup. As is Geonosis.. " A lump in my throat as memories of that terrible day came flooding back to me.
It had been just after Ariala had died. Fafnir delighted in the slaughter.I had become a harbringer of destruction on the sepratists. In short I had pretty much become the Jedi's secret weapon. I had been warned not to transform unless I was in life threatening danger. I hadn't gotten a handle of the switch like I should have. I look back wondering if I had, how many could I have saved? Espically when the battle droids closed in on us?

I shook myself and guided her out of the archives. " Go back to the apartment and for force's sake get . some. sleep. I have to talk to Mace and Yoda. I will be back soon. And don't try fibbing on me. I'll know" She smiled and headed the oppisite way I did. I braced myself.. I only hoped this meeting would go well..

An hour later I was shaking her awake with the news. " I got clearence from Mace and Yoda. We're to check every planet in the sector that falls under the pinpoint line.. But we're posing as civillans.. or in our case.. Time to step back into the political ring.." Geez she's adorable with sleep hair.. " We just have to be careful.. and we 'll report to the council bi weekly. Hurry and get packed. Our transport leaves in a half hour."

I left her to pack while I made the arangements for Belda. Hopefully when we returned this time She wouldn't have to live in fear of Marasha attacking her.

We met up again down in the entrance hall and hurried ot the landing pad. Mace was there waiting for us "Go and find her quickly. We all know how dangerous Marasha is alone, coupled with her sith master .. I don't want to think on it.. May the force be with you both"

We boarded the ship and I comed Bail to let him know what was going on and Phobia set the coordinates for Alderann. Phobia was fast asleep the moment she hit the couch.I sat staring out the window as the space rushed by us. Three things were certain.

Two would become one .

Fafnir carried the power to defeat Catia and send her to her sith master.

And as soon as Obi Wan returned from his current mission and things settled down.,relitively speaking. I needed to talk to him.

TBC