Hellos and Goodbyes

The trip itself was without incident. I looked forward to seeing the lush greenfields surrounding my home once again. But most of all I couldn't wait to show Phobia around and show her the places I had been, maybe even take her to meet Sensei Porgan.


Her eyes were wide with exictement and awe as we headed for the house. I made a mental note to show her aroun the gardens later. There was a view from the balcony in my room.


As we went inside I saw one of father's servents come rushing up. The force screamed at me in warning that something was wrong, terribly wrong. It was Rosalie" Godfrey, you've came.. just in time.. please hurry.. it's your father"

The bottom dropped out of my stomach and I hurriedly pulled Phobia along with me as we followed Rosalie down the long hall towards my father's room. The stench of death, masked by flowers grew stronger with each step we took.

When she opened the door my knees nearly buckled under me in utter fright and horror. There lay my fahter, but something had happened to him. He had not looked like this when I had visited wiht him just weeks prior. My father was only in his 50's but lying there , he looked over 700 years old.

My throat closed tightly like a vice and I could not speak. Phobia gripped my arm, a bit confused by what had me so upset until her eyes saw what mine did" is that?" she whispered, not really sure and I could feel for my sake, praying she was wrong. It wasthen father opened his eyes and turned to us, his eyes falling on me then shifting to her with a small smile.

He motioned her closer and I dropped back for a moment to try and allow them some privacy so they could speak.Furtunately I was too young to remember this almost same scene about 23 years ago whenever my mother Aurora passed away. It was she who had intruduced me to Sensei Porgan. A little known fact. She was his daughter.

I wasn't told til years later and even then when I brought it up to him, he seemed to hurt to want to speak of it so I let the matter lie.


I saw a flash of light in father's eyes then his head fell back on the pillows and he stilled. The force swelled in acceptance of his soul then settled back into it's normal cycle. A feeling of disilousionment settled over me, like I was here and I wasn't here. that maybe this was all a bad dream and I'd wake at the temple realizing I had drank one too many cups of jawa juice or cofee again.

I watched as she kissed his forehead in respect then she rose and came to me and forced me to look her in the eye. " Listen" she said , gently but there was a firm stubbrounness to her voice that somehow brought me back down to earth. " You still have me you will always have me . Now why don't we go for a walk? Maybe get settled in, help clear your thoughts. Let's just get out of here for now, let them do their job." she mumured indicating the servents who were waiting for us to leave so they could prepare him for the funeral late that night.


She always managed to bring outthe best in me, no matter what sort of self imposed hell I walked through.I wrapped an arm around her waist, a thin smile on my lips and guided her out of the room . I knew just where to go to help us both. I know of the nightares she has. She wakes in the middle of the night, paralyzed by fear.


She did let me write down what she sees, so maybe a pattern can be found. The only times anymore she has no nightmares is if she takes copious amounts of drugs which will eventually one day destroy her if she doesn't stop.


I pushed open the huge glass doors and guided her into the garden. There was a special tree in the middle of the garden that Sensei had given me to raise when I was only about 4. It is his treasure and it still flourishes today under tender love and care. It is a precinius tree that buds crystals on each equinox. The crystlas are sacred and are some of the strongest talismans to help stop nightmares.


Her mouth opened and she didn't say a word ,but just gaped. After a quick prayer of thanks to the tree I plucked one of the thickest crystals and threaded it onto a black leather rope before tying it behind her neck. The crystla glittered in the mid morning sunlight as a fog rolled in. " For your nightmraes love" I grapsed her hand with a reassuring squeeze just to make sure she was still able to retain concious thought.


She shot to her feet and pratically tackled me in a hug" How can I show you truly how I feel? I mean saying it is one thing , but you know what they say actions speak louder than words"


I was taken aback for a moment.She normally didn't let anyone into her head ,no one at all. But without me realizing it both of my hand s found their way to her temples and I kissed the center of her forehead before loosing myself in her eyes " open your mind to me.. show me"


It was like a bull in a china shop as every one of her shields dropped like glass. I was bombarded by images of her childhood, both in Spirit World and here as well. I saw every hurt she suffered, every battle won, I saw it all.

Then a tenative presence joined me as though we were walking side by side. It was Catia. I didn't hesitate. She was part of Pho as Pho was a part of her. 2 halves of the same equal. I embraced them both fully.

At last I managed to pull away and I found her on her knees in front of me while I somehow managed to remain standing andI could hear her soft sobbing. She was tired as was I. We had been bombarded by any and everything today.She had been riding on an emotional rollercoaster for sometime keeping our relationship secret from everyone and all. She did so much.. If I could lift the burden from her I would.


Instead I lifted her to her feet and we headed back inside as I headed for my room. I managed to pluck a red rose for her and tuck it behind her ear as she snuggled against me, one hand wound in my shirt.

Up the sidestairs and thefirst door on the right.. Everything was as I remembered it . I tucked her into bed and kissed her " sleep now my love, please, you need your strength." I turned to go whenever I heard her voice reply, though half asleep.


" Only if you'll lay here with me, just for a bit?"


I looked back over my shoulder at her. Big brown eyes, mussed hair and lord that smile.. Didn't she have a clue what she did to me?Apparently not because as I stood there, wondering if I had enough self control left to last til our wedding she said" Please? I can't sleep without knowing your rested too"


I cast my trust to the force and prayed this wouldn't go downhill . I kicked off my shoes and a moment later had joined her , one arm wrapped around her waist. A wisecrack rose on my lips from an old freind of mine but I figured it would be wiser to keep my mouth shut, instead I opted for " Now sleep we'll go out shopping later, and head to the docks. Remember Anakin should be here soon"


After a while she slept, a smile on her face and her mind at rest. I moved slightly namely to prevent her from ending up on me the wrong way and I guess I hadn't realizied how tired I was, because a moment later, sleep claimed me as well.


I woke late in the afternoon , in truth one of my weaknesses. I always do sleep late unless I have something to do.I moved gingerly so I didn't wake Pho and I ducked into the fresher for a fast shower. I had just finished and dressed whenever Pho's com was going off. I could hear the cussing clear across the room. If I had to guess it was Anakin.

I shook her awake once I had gotten my boots on. " Pho ?Pho? c'mon we're late and your com is ringing dear" She woke looking around muzzily and reached for her com when she felt it vibrating against her hip.

I grabbed a chair and waited for her to dress, not wanting to peek but I couldn't resist whenever her shirt went flying up over the changing screen. though I was only gifted with the hint of a soft curve before she shooed me out of the room and told me to go check on the fighters and make sure they were ready.

Laughing I left her to her own devices and in a few minutes she met me downstairs. In a word, stunning. absoulelty beautiful. you can see the picture over on her blog ,but needless to say she took my breath away. We both headed outside and took our fighters to the docks. she was a tad overeager to meet up with Anakin and went ahead. guiding my starfighter through the blue Corellian skies I wondered what sort of glaaxy this was to bring tow of the unlikeliest together, then I realized,an unlikely one indeed.

A smooth landing at the docks and I simply got out of my fighter and eaned against he durasteel hull waiting for Phobia and Anakin to come back . I could hear their voices at the other end of the hangar. As Phobia led him back and made the introductions I studied Anakin closely. One brief look told me that he and I walked like paths. Many troubles weighed heavily on his mind. Having to live up to a thousand year old legacy is no easy task. I could tell by the battle hardened weary look in his eyes.There was also a pure light hidden beneath the surface, but battle and death had almost snuffed it out.


Pho's fighter was belching smoke and as she ran back down to check on it Anakin turned to me and said " so your Godfrey huh? She's told me much about you"

" all good I hope"

" Of course. She means a lot to all of us. The temple wouldn't be the same without her."

" I know"

" You do realize that if you hurt her in any way I'll make you wish you were a sith?"

" That goes double for you"

He laughed" Point taken Godfrey, c'mon I think she finally got that thing fixed "

And sure enough Pho was back, smiling from ear to ear, a few smudges of grease on her face but otherwise perfectly spotless.She told Anakin to take it easy and I could see that light in his eyes comming back stronger than ever before. I headed back to my fighter and headed back to the house,A yellow and black fighter following me close behind.

When I arrived back Rosalie was there, her small hands wringing in worry. " Godfrey, I need to see you.. I found something you need to see. "

I followed her into the room oppisite anakin's that Pho showed him into. She had seven golden wine glasses lined in a row" I found these in the new guy's room. take a closer look"
I inspected each of the glasses carefully .

They had one thing in common. The smell of rotting meat combined with the sweetness of honey. " These were my father's glasses over the past week?"

" Ya his nightly wine, served by the new man. Name of Barabas I think. He disappeared yesterday. "
Anger filled me like I had never known. Rosalie didn't know it but these glasses also had traces of darkside energy along with Digamarka pooison. I had only seen the effects of it once before today. Administered over a long period of time it tears away at the body and the mind until nothing is left. Father was lucky. He passed on before The poison worked it's full potential.

I nodded to Rosalie and left the room, the door slamming shut behind me with a crash to shake the roof down. I wanted to go and see Pho but I feared my anger might scare her.

Instead I settled for going through mother's old blackgowns and finding a dress for her for this evening. The golden dragon combs and the matching black slippers I set out on the chair in my room.

My rage dissapated the second I set eyes on her peaceful face. I had forced her to sleep earlier after she had sent Anakin to do the same. I removed my boots and shirt and slipped into bed next to her, shoving any thoughts of revenge from my mind for the present. All I needed was here and now in my arms.
Until Later